These 360 glasses will give you eyes in the back of your head

And eyes in the front. But you may have had those already.

Are those tiny lenses?

Remember when you used to think your teacher had eyes in the back of her head? Well, now she does. In fact, eyes all around her head, thanks to the Orbi Prime sunglasses she is, for the purpose of this imagination, wearing.

Bit unprofessional, wearing sunnies in the classroom?

Ah, showing your age there. Teaching has moved on since your Molesworthian education – for example, the kids all write their essays on Apple Watches, one character at a time. But should one of those rectangle-eyed beta humans be checking his stocks, rather than writing ‘My Easter Holiday’, our Orbi-wearing teacher has four 1080p cameras recording his deviancy, wherever she might be facing.

Not in real-time, though?

Well, it’s happening in real-time. Schooling hasn’t become that advanced. But you’re right - despite Orbi’s claims that its app can rapidly stitch together the four footage feeds into a 4K pan ‘n’ scan extravaganza, Mrs Miggins isn’t going to see the rearward discrepancy happening through her actual eyes. She’ll have to save the footage for a terrifically futuristic - but no less disappointing - VR parent’s evening.

Plus, as all this capturing and Wi-Fi’ing will see the Orbi’s battery expire after 90 minutes, she’ll have to have several pairs of these primed to cover a day’s classes. And then spend all night reviewing and labelling. It all sounds a bit exhausting, even for a teacher.

It all sounds a bit unlikely. These aren’t for teachers, huh?

Nope. They’re aimed at outdoorsy, sporty, love-the-smell-of-adrenline-in-the-morning types. Who, by happy coincience, tend to be the kind of tax-paying, BMW-owning right ‘uns that can afford a US$329 Indiegogo splurge.