Not-so-curved is the new curved, according to the Sony Bravia S90 4K TV

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A new TV! And just in time for Great British Bake-Off…

Not quite, you crème caramel, the first episode was last night. There is, however, always the BBC iPlayer. Which is actually the preferred way of watching Bake Off because it lets you pause and rewind the exciting bits. But what you won’t hear is Mary Berry complaining that the side of one of the cakes looks curved when it should be straight. Because while Sony’s new S90 is its first in the UK with a curved screen, it is less prominently curved than other TVs of its ouvre and so straight line distortion is minimised.

But how would Mary know… oh, never mind. So curved TVs are bad, is that the story now?

Uh-oh, soggy bottom – your conclusion is under-baked! The advantage of a curved TV – the way it delivers light to the curved surface of your peepers – is all present and correct. But the S90 is the result of some hefty research into where the sweet curve radius lies. Between 5000mm and 11000mm, says Sony. The icing on the cake is that this is a 4K set, speckled with tasty decorations such as 4K X-Reality PRO, X-tended Dynamic Range and Motionflow XR800Hz.

These bake-isms are making me feel a bit sick.

That’s because your eyes are bigger than your ears. Which is also no matter because the S90 has a unique 4.2-channel virtual surround sound system that’s going to fire those Mel and Sue zingers straight to your brainbox. Above and below those edge-mounted TV status lights are an effects speaker aimed eight-degrees outward and front speakers aimed seven degrees in towards to your lugs. Two subwoofer drivers make up the numbers.

‘Subwoofers’ in TVs are like dandelion cakes: weedy.

Well, then, you’ll be pleased to hear that you can specify a wireless subwoofer for your S90 and, what’s more, that said sub is now available in both black and white to suit more of the stylish apartments that said TV is likely to end up in. Prices have yet to be announced for either the 65in or 75in versions of this new TV – but they’re likely to be more tea-at-the-Ritz than yum-yums-at-Greggs.

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About

Fraser used to wear a Psion Series 3 palmtop in a shoulder holster. Perhaps he still does.Either way, his lifelong mission - including fourteen years for Stuff - has been to see whether the consumer electronics industry can ever replicate that kind of cyborgian joy.So far: nope. Despite a plan to combine a action camera and Olympus Eye-Trek goggles to become Man Who Sees The Vision Of A Man Three Inches Taller Than Himself.He also likes mountain bikes, motorbikes, cars, helicopters. Still thinks virtual surround is witchcraft. Dislikes jetskis, despite never having been on one.