If CCM’s new bike is for hipsters, then cover us in beard oil and call us Jean-Sebastien

The kids come a-running when they hear the Spitfire's roar

That looks nice. When are they going to finish it?

It is finished. Paint is what you do to make something messy look neat. The CCM Spitfire has been artisanally crafted and welded - using the same British T45 steel as used in Spitfire fighter planes - by master torch wielder Ted Unwin. You didn’t ought to cover that up, guv’nor.

Oh, I suppose it’s a one-off, then?

Not this time. Just like Microsoft and Samsung, CCM lets its designers and engineers muck about in the workshop at the weekends. When the ‘Skunkwerx’ team came up with this, CCM upheld its reputation as the risk-taking wee terrier of global bike makers and put some money behind it. And so, if you want a Spitfire, you can have one. Though you’ll need £7995, and a couple of months patience. Unlike James Blunt, who has his already.

James Blunt? Good grief, I’m out. 

Come on. You can’t live like that. Are you going to take off that Apple Watch just because Ant and Dec have them? And just look at the Spitfire. Chunky 19in wheels front and back, driven by a 600cc single-cylinder engine that likely has healthy Husqvarna/BMW lineage. As befits a company with off-road racing heritage the suspension is high-end and highly adjustable, while the LED headlight, digital dash and carbon bits add a soupcon of geekery. It’ll be light, brisk and noisy in appropriate portions. 

But, if it’s still not to your taste, then CCM has also promised a new 600cc version of its pioneering, bonded-frame adventure bike, the GP450. But you’ll have to wait until 2018 for that, and probably still queue in a leathery line of CCM-loving celebs.