If your tinfoil hat doesn't really match the rest of your decor then you'll be relieved to hear that there's a double-whammy solution to your style woes and security concerns – anti-Wi-Fi wallpaper.
The special wallpaper (created by the Centre Technique du Papier) features a specially designed pattern of silver crystals which specifically block the frequencies emitted by your Wi-Fi router.
If silver walls aren't your thing then you can even paint over the sheets, though you'll still have to slather your ceiling and floor in the stuff to ensure that your signal is completely blocked to the outside world. Bummer.
The wallpaper is slated to cost around the same as traditional mid-range wallpaper, and there's also a transparent version in the works to tackle pesky windows.
Or you could just, you know, choose a network password other than 'password', but each to their own.
British kit flies the flag